As you sit in your hostel garden, feeling the heat dissipate with the oncoming nightfall, your stomach rumbles. It's been a long, stifling day, so hot and so humid that your appetite was suppressed to a mere afterthought, which has left you without any energy at all. But it's cool now. The temperature has dropped, and your lungs open to full bore, sucking in the fresh evening air and bringing you instantly to life. You peer at your belly. You need food. You need it now.
But where? KL is a massive metropolis, stuffed to the gills with restaurants, and searching through the travel guidebook for a place to eat leaves your head doing revolutions. How does one find the right spot amongst so many? Is there a diamond in the rough that really defines Malaysian cuisine, yet doesn't put a dent in your bank account the size of a large coconut? There's no possible way you can try every place out in the limited time you have, so it's imperative that you make the right choice immediately. How to decide?
Fortunately, I can make it easy for you. For I, The Thirsty Traveler Who Is Also Sometimes Hungry, have taken it upon myself to solve the KL culinary conundrum, and after countless laksas, myriad stir frys and several midnight trips to the toilet, all is well. The secret is no longer a secret. The reports are no longer classified. The cat is out of the bag.
Want to stuff your face? Then Jalan Alor Road the place.
THE APPETIZER: Food on the Jalan Alor is pricey by Malaysian standards, so it's best not to dive in with a completely empty gas tank. I suggest a warm-up: a plate of mixed vegetables with rice to cleanse the palette and ease your stomach into the game, much like an athlete stretching his legs before taking on any serious training. For this I propose you try a walk-up eatery with a buffet such as Restoran Cheow Kee, where the friendly owners will be happy to fill a plate for you from the two dozen fresh, piping hot offerings behind the counter. Thai-style red curry bean curd, fast-fried baby bok choy with garlic and steamed oyster mushrooms with hoisin sauce are all worth a nibble, as are the Portuguese veggie stew and the agadashi tofu. But be careful – don't eat too much, or you'll be out of commission long before the real eating begins.
THE MAIN COURSE: With the ocean just a few miles away, fish is the magic word on Jalan Alor Road. Every restaurant serves it, but selecting the right fish at the right restaurant can be a headache, inasmuch as touts stand out in front of each eatery, waving their menus and beckoning you inside. It's hit and miss, so allow me to point you in the right direction. If it's Thai-style you're looking for, then the Ah Noi Thai Food Restoran is the superlative destination. The woks are glowing hot, and blue swimmer crab, scallops on the half-shell and jumbo prawns all glisten in the ice trays near the seating area. Choose a selection of seafood, then sit back over a Tiger beer while the portly chef cooks everything up in a veritable conflagration in the kitchen. The oysters come lightly steamed with ginger and coriander, and the seabass is deep-fried to perfection and drizzled with a spicy melange of hot chili paste, garlic and lemongrass. If you like the spice then you'll be pleased; this stuff leaves you gasping for breath.
Looking to enjoy the local flavours without charring the insides of your mouth? Then go Malaysian style. At the Kedan Makanan Sedap Charn Kee Tasty Corner and its sister restaurant, the Restoran Meng Kee Grill Fish (I'm not making these up), the fish is barbequed and served plain, bringing the true essence of the sea to your tastebuds without rendering your tongue in need of a graft. Malaysia has hundreds of indigenous fish species, but to eat like the locals do you'll have to order a chickenfish. Fat, snow-white and nearly boneless, the chickenfish is the most popular item of the lot, even if the name is suspect. I refuse to believe it is called that, but the Malaysians insist and I won't argue. I guess it does settle the old 'chicken or fish' debate on airplanes. And as a side note, the Monty Python guys would like to remind you that ravenfish, partridgefish and peregrinfalconfish are also excellent choices. But if you're like me, then as accompaniment to your chickenfish you should ask for grilled sting ray and salt-and-pepper calamari instead.
THE DESSERT: By now you'll be ready to explode, so sit back, take a walk, do whatever you need to do to recover quickly, because dessert is still to come. Proceed directly to the ABC Special Restoran, and order up a couple of bowls of langan ice. This little symphony of tastes is comprised of a mountain of crushed ice covered in a fruity syrup that comes in flavours like blueberry, strawberry, kiwi and sea coconut. As a garnish, the whole shebang is sprinkled with fresh lychees, home-made gelatin, and little jellies that explode in your mouth like pop-rocks. At about $1.50 per bowl, it's not to be missed.
Though there is one thing that is definitely to be missed, and that's the Berkamulang. I'm not sure who decided to combine coconut, sweetcorn, jelly and beans in a dessert, but the end result is worse than some of the monstrosities being concocted in first year Potions class at Hogwarts. Stay away!
Satisfied now? Good. Then my job is done. I recommend you head back home and allow your body to begin the digestion process, because tomorrow is a new day. With the onset of another dawn, more delicacies will flood in from the local markets, and tomorrow will be a brand new opportunity to tickle your soul with Malaysian culinary delights. And if you do end up finding out the real name for chickenfish, I'd surely like to know.
Many thanks go out to Andrea and Erica, my Italian amicos who braved the wild and wacky world on Jalan Alor Road for six consecutive nights with me, making my time in Kuala Lumpur an absolute pleasure. Salut to you guys!
Anyway, that's a wrap on Southeast Asia. It's been grand. But now, it's once again come time to take to the road, to leave what's done behind, to move on to other things.
Flight EY011, now leaving Kuala Lumpur to...
...doesn't matter. As long as she's there to pick me up.
"I pack my case
I check my face
I look a little bit older
I look a little bit colder." -The Killers
"Every monkey want to be
In my place instead of me
'Cause I'm the King of Bongo, baby
I'm the King of Bongo Bong." -Manu Chao
2 comments:
Estarei la. Nao se preocupe!
Beijos,
Good job mate!
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