Zzzzzzambia

The Lonely Planet Southern Africa guidebook describes Zambia as being famous for "excellent fishing". Well I don't know about that, but I can share a few of my experiences from this pleasant, but decidedly dull country.

I entered Zambia after crossing the Zambezi on a ferry from Botswana. It is the shortest international border in the world at only 650m long. It's also a very perilous border, though not insofar as the two nations are warring; the danger is brought on by hippos and crocs who on occasion come to shore and kill people who are sitting about waiting for the boat to depart.

At the immigration control, I paid $55US for the privilege of a 2 week visa. To date this year, I have spent $365US on visas, and there is no end in sight. Of the remaining countries I intend to visit before the end of my African sojourn, none of them offer free entry. $55 seems a tad steep, but it's exactly what Canadians charge Zambians to enter our country. For me, that represents less than two hours of work. For them, it could be weeks' worth of income.

My first stop was Livingstone, a town named after the famed Scottish missionary who is credited with the discovery of nearby Victoria Falls. Livingstone is excellent - it has nightlife, it has amenities, and it has food, the latter being a refreshing change from Zimbabwe. It also has Jollyboys, which was one of the best hostels I've been to in Africa as of yet, though that may have been because there were 20-some Swedish nurses staying there...

What Livingstone does not have at this time of year is much in the way of a waterfall. The long dry season is nearly over but the rains haven't yet begun, and so Vic Falls is running at 10% of its peak output. I'm now very glad that I visited the Zim side in August, when things were still thundering. Nonetheless, a visit to the Zam side in October still pays off, if only because you can walk straight across the nearly dry Zambezi river bed, and have someone take a picture of you with 50% of your body perched precariously over the edge. No need to fear - it's only 108m to the jagged rocks below.

From Livingstone I head to Lusaka. It may be the capital, but Lusaka must be the most uninspiring city I've ever visited, and my list includes Sudbury, Dusseldorf and Newark! Lusaka is little more than a network of dusty streets flanked by rows of graying Soviet-era buildings, interspersed with malodourous and ramshackle shantytowns. A German guy told me that Lusaka is great "if you know people". Well danke for the insight, Klaus, but I'm from the Canadian prairies, and most of the people I'm acquainted with are like characters from Corner Gas, so how is it that I'm expected to have friends in Southern Zambia? After 2 hours spent walking around the city I was suffering from ennui, so I returned to the hostel to endure an entire evening of listening to an Israeli guy regale me with tales of all the girls he's bagged in Africa. I'm sure that most of these strumpets were of the plastic inflatable variety, or perhaps just mere figments of his vivid imagination.

My ultimate Zambian stop was Chipata, a nondescript bordertown from which you can cross into Malawi. I saw little of interest in Chipata save for the sign in the bathroom of my guesthouse that read "Please flash toilet after use". I'd say most people flash it during use! Ohhhh!

It is a shame that while Zambia is a well-to-do country with outstanding people, it has little to offer to backpackers. Many of the principle attractions, such as Lake Kariba and South Luangwa National Park, cater to the affluent package tourist (ex: 5-day excursions to SLNP start at $595US). Zambia is also massive, oddly-shaped and has poor road conditions, which together make for some marathon bus rides. For those with a great deal of cash and their own transport, this may be an ideal destination. As for me, I'll just have to settle for a short visit to see 10% of a waterfall, drink Mosi beer and chat with Swedish nurses.

Querida: tou brincando =)